Getting To Know VOX: Kevin Blickfeldt takes the Proust Personality Questionnaire
What is your perfect idea of happiness?
- I’m not sharing that with you, but the PG-13 version involves a lot of laughter and some sort of eternal mimosa brunch with loved ones.
What is your greatest fear?
- Losing the love of the person I love most.
Which historical figure do you most identify with?
- Marie Antoinette’s baker.
Which living person do you most admire?
- Salman Rushdie, Stephen Sondheim, Malala Yousafzai.
What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
- Where to start?! HA! 1. My verbosity 2. My penchant for leaving important tasks for the last minute. (Yes, I left two answers when only asked for one—Please see answer number one if you have more questions)
What is your greatest extravagance?
- My hair product that costs more than my haircuts.
What is your favorite journey?
- Enough about there, have you ever been to me? Kidding! I love the few miles drive into Palm Springs on Highway 111. I also love the ferryboat ride into the San Juan Islands from Washington State.
What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
- Stoicism. I wear my heart on my sleeve and don’t get people that don’t do the same. A new study is out proving that people who complain live longer. It’s just science, people! Accordingly, Woody Allen may actually be immortal...
On what occasion do you lie?
- Lie?! Never…well…hardly ever…unless…
What do you dislike most about your appearance?
- My pregnant glow.
Which living person do you most despise?
- The pianist of whom we shall not speak.
Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
- Whenever there is a lull in conversation or something awkward happens socially, I say, “well...here we all are!” Ask any of my friends; they are sick to death of it.
What is your greatest regret?
- My childhood obsession with Milli Vanilli. I LOVED them! The day I found out they were fakes, I tore the poster I had hanging in my room in half and smashed their cassette tape. First break-ups are the hardest they say…
What or who is the greatest love of your life?
- This person knows who they are.
When and where were you happiest?
- This very moment.
Which talent would you most like to have?
What is your current state of mind?
- I’m feeling fairly precocious.
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
- I wish I were a little bit taller. 6’3” sounds nice until I consider air travel.
If you could change one thing about your family, what would it be?
- My mother’s side of the family loves to embarrass me by bringing up ridiculous things I did growing up. “So there he was, his first solo performance on stage,” my aunts recall--their story becoming more inflated with each telling. “He is in front of the ENTIRE middle school and all their parents. his zipper is wide open!” To this day I’m not sure what was more traumatizing: the light breeze coming in from my nether regions, or my aunt--who by this point had snuck backstage--whisper-screaming from the wing, “XY--ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!” (Truth be told, I actually kinda sorta love it when my family does this.)
What do you consider your greatest achievement?
- My doctorate.
If you were to die and come back as a person or thing, what do you think it would be?
- Gilbert Gottfried.
If you could choose what to come back as, what would it be?
- A Kobe beef cow. Can you imagine how incredible it would be to live your day-to-day life on a strict diet of only beer? You’d be massaged for hours on end by a team of specialists and suspended by straps—your feet never to touch the ground for fear of engaging your muscles and toughening your meat. It would be a short life, but it would be a fantastic one.
What is your most treasured possession?
- The love of the one I love.
What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
- Memorizing the words to a Russian opera as I wait in a never-ending line at the DMV.
Where would you like to live?
What is your favorite occupation?
- I most admire good teachers.
What is your most marked characteristic?
- My ability to liven up a party.
What is the quality you most like in a man?
- Compassion and a boisterous, hearty laugh.
What is the quality you most like in a woman?
- Sense of humor. I adore funny women. I was raised by funny women.
What do you most value in your friends?
- Conscientiousness. Also they should give me a hard time and make my belly hurt from laughing.
Who are your favorite writers?
- Nabokov, Tina Fey, Hemingway, Jorge Amado, Michelle Brittan Rosado, Stacey Schiff, David Sedaris, and Rilke.
Who is your favorite hero of fiction?
- Patsy & Edina from Ab Fab.
Who are your heroes in real life?
- Those who devote their professional life to art, regardless of commercial success.
What are your favorite names?
- Hagen, Ava, Beyoncé, any ridiculous celebrity baby named after a fruit or legume.
What is it that you most dislike?
- Insecurity masked as meanness.
How would you like to die?
- Do I have to?
What is your motto?
- “Laughter heals all wounds,”
“Why the hell not?!”